Thinking Out Of The Box

After having a chat with a close friend on Friday it made me want to write this blog entry. It makes me so angry when people are judged or misunderstood simply because they have a difficulty or have something about them which makes them stand out from everybody else. This may be that they need to use a wheelchair or use crutches or may be a hidden condition such as dyslexia or dyspraxia, or even someone might just be a very shy person.

It doesn't take long just to see past those difficulties and get to know the real person, and see the many positive things about them. Once you get to know them you can find out what an amazing person they really are. It may take a while for them to come out of their shell but it takes time and understanding. Society is a very neurotypical world and there is a lot of pressure for people to conform and be like everyone else. Sadly if someone doesn't posses that persona, it can often lead to people being stigmatised and not understood. Just because someone has a weakness or difficulty doesn't mean that they are stupid or thick or unable to do things, they can do just as much as anyone else with the right understanding. Most people who have a condition hate any kind of fuss made about it, they hate the idea of people feeling sorry for them, for me personally this has always been the case and I'd hate someone being like oh poor you etc it would make me really embarrassed. All people need is a tiniest bit of understanding to why they may learn slighly differntly, and a good sense of humour to laugh at many of the funny things that may happen. Always focus on what people can do not what they can't. So next time you see someone sitting shyly and quiety by themselves, obviously anxious by the situation why not go over and say hi, ask them how their day was, or weekend. Maybe you see someone struggling with a wheelchair or with crutches instead of barging past them or thinking what stops them doing, give them a hand and talk about other things. Or there may be the clumsy person who always spills food down them when they eat, or seemingly trips over air, have a laugh about it. By doing this from personal experience it really helps improve someones self esteem and confidence no end.

This blog can be applied to so many different situations and contexts. But I often have often newly diagnosed younger people who come to me and say "Rosie help my school are rubbish they don't understand dyslexia." Or "I'm so scared of telling people, I don't want to be seen as different, none of my teachers know." Or more then often a combination of both.
So I thought I'd give some general advice on how to get the right support and help other people understand you. It won't be an easy journey, and I'm going to be honest in saying that at some point in life you will meet someone who is quite ignorant to your needs and doesn't understand why people deserve extra time and extra time, I've met many of them in my time. Unfortunatley society isn't an understanding society, and that can applied to so many things not just learning challenges, mental health is one area which still needs a lot of understanding and thinking out of the box.

Also teenagers especially will always be teenagers any sign of anyone standing out slightly different and they don't get it. I have talked to people who have been so self concious to use things like coloured overlays because of what other people have said, and let's be honest if you asked the majority of teenagers why a dyslexic person would need to use coloured paper or overlays they would be completely clueless. This is why I think there needs to be a lot more peer understanding about conditions like dyslexia, they need to be talked about in school assemblies and in other lessons so peers know why people lear the way they do, and that it isn't people being stupid or thick it's just them finding their own way of learing so that they could reach their potential.

This is why I admire so much what Mollie King talks about when she talks aout her dyslexia, not just that she's overcome a lot to achieve well at school but that she's open about the help she recieved and open that she used things like coloured paper and overlays to help her learn bettter. I know it may make you feel a bit self concious at first but if it helps you achieve your potential then it's deffo a good thing.

Even though there is a lot more awareness surrounding conditions like dyslexia these days there still needs to be lot to be done. It can be so hard aswell when you're the only one in your class who learns differently and everyone else is speeding off and can write amazing essays and get full marks in one evening, but remember you never are alone, there are so many others going through what you are and there are so many people in the public eye who have battled these things too. As you get older you will probably find more people who do, especially if you decide to go onto university.

Unfortunatly not everybody still understands dyslexia and other conditions even if you go to a school/college which has a really good learning support team, some teachers are still in the dark ages or are very good teachers but simply haven't had the training to understand it. Did you know on teacher training degrees and degrees in education there is no module on dyslexia or other conditions? In my time at uni we had ONE lecture on inclusion in general. It will probably always be a battle to you gettng the right support and understanding but keep figting, it's up to you to proove people wrong who may have put you down and thought you would never make it or achieve things. When I recieved my masters degree in May I really felt like I'd proved wrong the people in the past who had called me stupid It was a very good feeling. If I can do it so can you. The more we talk about conditions like dyslexia the more awareness there is and the less likely people are to hide that they have it. Also find other things that you are good at, that's one thing mollie always says, you may find you are talented in music or sport or art or in general a really understanding person but there are so many things that you are good at as well as the things you may struggle in. It will be a battle but YOU WILL get to the other side, you just have to have the determination to prove people wrong.